


Woytober Prompt Collection

by Aloneindarknes7



Category: Wander Over Yonder
Genre: Adventure, Autumn, Cannibalism, Child Neglect, Childhood Trauma, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Drabble Collection, Established Relationship, F/M, Friendship, Future Fic, Gen, Halloween Costumes, Implied Relationships, M/M, Multi, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-18 22:37:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 17,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8178671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aloneindarknes7/pseuds/Aloneindarknes7
Summary: 31 different prompts for 31 days of October all about Wander, Sylvia, Peepers, and Lord Hater. Each prompt will hopefully be 500 words only. Unless stated otherwise, these will be set in a future where all four of them have accepted their odd little friendship/relationships. Most of these will probably be pretty domestic. Some might be spooky. Each chapter will have warnings posted if there are any warnings needed.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt #1: Fall Festival   
> No warnings needed  
> Oddly enough, I wandered into a Fall Jubilee in my small town today when I had only meant to get some apples from the farmer's market. So I ended up getting apples, cheesy fries, a henna tattoo, pumpkin woopie pies, a gift for my dad's upcoming Birthday, different flavored peanut butter, and I got to watch dogs perform tricks. It was a great day!

“What a neat little town!” Wander exclaimed, bringing his hands up to frame his face as he looked down the sloping hill at the flashing orange and yellow lights. 

“I don’t remember it looking like this last time we were here.” Hater frowned and rubbed at his chin. “There was definitely more fire last time.”

“That’s because we were conquering it and set the town on fire, sir.” Peepers reminded.

“Oh, right.” Hater nodded.

“It’s their festival of the changing seasons.” Sylvia spoke up, a little away from the group as she read a piece of paper posted on a large wooden sign that read ‘Community Board’ over it. “Their planet is known for the trees changing colors once a year. They celebrate this time by drinking warm drinks, eating many foods flavored with apples or pumpkins, and overall enjoying the change from hot temperatures to more mild and windy ones.”

“Sounds neat!” Wander stated at the same time Hater said “That sounds dumb.”

Peepers looked from Hater to Wander. “Well, we’re already here. Might as well try it out.” The wind blew from behind them, making Peepers wrap his arms around himself and shiver. “I wouldn’t mind getting one of those warm drinks, at the very least.”

Wander was already pulling a scarf out of his hat and offering it to the Commander. Peepers took it wordlessly and wrapped it around his neck, wiggling his eyeball head deep into the soft warmth. 

“Come on, what are we waiting for?” Wander raced down the hill, the very wind seeming to lift him, and a few leaves, up off the ground and carry him safely into the town.

Hater heaved a disgruntled sigh. “Fine, but if this festival is lame I’m going to set the town on fire again.” He smirked, looking down at Peepers. “That’ll warm this place up.”

Sylvia shoved the two down the hill. “Yeah, yeah, come on, I want to try this ‘pumpkin pie’ and see if it’s close to being as good as jellyfish pie.” 

When they finally made it into town, Wander was already wearing a large sweater with a pattern of multicolored leaves sewn onto it and had a mug of steaming apple cider in one hand and a caramel covered apple on a stick in the other hand. He grinned a sticky smile at his friends. “You gotta try these!” 

Five pumpkin pies later, a dozen covered apples, and a numerous amount of cider, followed by numerous trips to the bathroom, the gang found themselves sitting around a bonfire. The night had started pretty quickly on this planet. Leaves kept falling off of the surrounding trees, one landing on Hater’s head, and being picked up by the wind to float around them. They watched the wind rattle the trees and the listened to the fire pop. 

“So?” Wander asked, scooting closer to Hater’s side.

“Alright, as far as lame festivals go,” Hater grumbled, “it wasn’t as lame as I thought it would be.”


	2. Hot Cocoa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #2 Hot Cocoa  
> No warnings needed.

“Stealth and precision is the key,” Peepers pointed up on the board. “If we use these skills we’ll be able to achieve our objective in no time. Now, let me explain my simple forty-two step plan and then we can--”

“That’ll never work, Peepers!” Hater interrupted and slammed his fists down on the table. “I know I normally wait to say that about your stupid plans once you’ve actually started explaining them, but I thought I’d go ahead and just point out the giant flaw in your plan now; we’re planning against Wander! Wander doesn’t understand anything subtle or stealthy. He’s also not precise about anything. He’s all go with the flow and your gut feelings. If we’re going to beat him, we can’t do it by matching wits with his crafty plans. We have to go brutal strength; it’s our only advantage.”

Hater walked around the table and tore Peepers’ carefully crafted plan off the board. He pulled out a crumbled piece of paper out of his pocket and thumbtacked it into the middle of the board. Hater smacked the doodled image of him holding a stick figure Wander. “We need to grab him and shake him until we get what we want out of him!”

“Oh please, that’ll never work.” Peepers scoffed.

“I agree,” Sylvia nodded. “If we’re going to be serious about achieving our goal, then we have to go out with the big guns. If we’re going to strike, we have to strike hard and big the first time or else he’ll know our intentions with anything else.” Sylvia slowly stood up and moved to stand next to the two. All eyes were on her as she took a deep breath and released it with two words, “Emotional manipulation.”

“That’s brilliant!” Peepers exclaimed. “Why didn’t I think of that?” He frowned, disappointed in himself.

“Hit him where it hurts, his big heart.” Hater nodded, a wicked smile forming on his face. He rubbed his hands together excitedly. “Oh, this has to work, I just know it!” 

The three worked together to hunt down Wander. They found him in the kitchen, humming and swinging his hips as he stirred a pot that wafted the most delicious smells throughout the Skullship. They approached quietly, but quickly. Their bulk boxed Wander in against the stove as he glanced over his shoulder and smiled at the three of them.

“Well, howdy, buddies. It’s almost ready now,” Wander continued to stir the pot, three times clockwise, two times counter-clockwise, then repeat. 

“Wander, as your friends, we were wondering,” Sylvia began.

“If you would be so kind as to share your hot cocoa recipe.” Peepers stated and then looked worriedly at Hater. It was all resting on him now.

Hater wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead. “Please.”

Wander turned around to face the three. His eyes were as wide as his smile. “You really want my family’s secret hot cocoa recipe?” They all nodded eagerly. Wander chuckled. “Sorry, but no.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #3: Monster Monday Wander  
> Warnings: I wrote this to try and be scary, but there is literally nothing scary that happens

He kept running and looking forward. If he looked back, he might trip and seal his doom. If he looked back, he might see it right behind him. If he looked back, he might still see his best friend being taken. He had to keep going forward.

His heartbeat seemed too loud. His breathing was too heavy and it felt like the air was too thin, he couldn’t get enough oxygen to fill his lungs. His thoughts were racing through his head. He wanted to scream and cry but he didn’t dare make a loud noise and alert it. 

It was too dark. He could barely make out where he was running towards. He knew it wouldn’t matter where he ended up. There was no where he could hide from it. There was barely any reason to run but he had to keep moving anyways.

The same horror he had seen before kept running through his mind. He could still hear the echoing screams of the others. The looks of terror on their faces would haunt him for the rest of his life. If the monster got to him, then the rest of his life would be soon. His terrors would all end as they began.

The glowing eyes, the bright, sharp teeth, and the noises, oh the inhuman noises. A quiet whimper slipped out from him and he forced his legs to move faster. The slapping of his feet against the floor seemed to echo through the halls and for a horrifying moment, he thought he might be the last one left. That meant he was next.

Taking his chances, he picked a room at random and slammed the door behind him. He leaned against the door, barricading it with his body while his body took the sudden stop to try and regain some control over his spinning emotions. He felt like his body was dripping with sweat, that he could hear the pitter patter of the drops hitting the floor. 

No, he realized with dawning dread, that wasn’t his sweat making that sound. “Please,” he whispered, his voice hoarse from his earlier screams, “please.” He reached a shaky hand out and turned on the light in the room. 

Laughter filled the room, rattling his bones. “It looks like I made a mess.” The sharp teeth were practically shining in the large, eerie smile, illuminated by the single lightbulb in the broom closet. “I should have let the glue dry more, I guess. I’ll clean it up, I promise.” It came closer to him, arms outstretched, and large eyes focused on his every movement. “But I was just too excited to see your face when I gave it to you!” He pressed himself tighter against the door with every step it took closer to him. There was no chance of escape though.

“Come on, Hater, aren’t you going to open your present? I made it myself,” Wander explained.

Hater closed his eyes and accepted his fate. He opened it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #4: Favorite Candy  
> Warnings: Alcohol consumption
> 
> Okay, but this has been my favorite for the first week so far.

“Jawbreakers,” Hater grinned. Wander and Sylvia shared a quick concerned look. “Or anything that lasts a while. Lollipops are good too.”

“I like sour candies the best. Hard or gooey, it’s all good as long as it makes my lips pucker up.” Sylvia answered.

“I like anything sweet, it’s too tough to try and pick just one.” Wander scratched at his head. “Sometimes I’m in the mood for something sticky, or something to suck on, or just a good piece of chocolate to melt in my mouth.” Wander licked his lips. “What about you, C Peeps? What’s your favorite candy?”

“I don’t much like sweets,” Peepers claimed. “Sugar has no health benefits and is completely pointless.” He crossed his arms over his chest.

Sylvia rolled her eyes. “Of course. You’re so typically boring.”

“Please, he’s lying. Peepers always has a huge jar of gummy bears hidden somewhere in his room.” Hater grinned as Peepers went rigid. “He used to bring it to our meetings. It would start off filled to the brim and he’d start talking about whatever he chose to nag me and the Watchdogs about for the day. He’d take handfuls in between slides and by the end the jar would be empty. He wouldn’t even share any with me.” Hater rubbed at his gloves. “He used to smack my hands if I tried to take any. He’s obsessed with them.”

“I used to! I used to love gummy bears, but not anymore. Ever since I started to take my exercise regime and new clean eating lifestyle into consideration I’ve gotten rid of any and all bad habits, including gummy bears.” Peepers crossed his arms over his chest and nodded.

Sylvia smirked and glanced at Hater. “So, you’re saying if Hater and I went into your room we wouldn’t find a container of gummy bears?”

Peepers narrowed his eye. “I’m not saying that. There is still a gummy bear jar in my room, but I haven’t touched it in months. It’s still filled because throwing them away would be a waste of food.”

“Well if there’s a full jar of gummy bears you no longer want, I’m sure we could all help you get rid of it.” Sylvia winked at Hater and he grinned, rubbing his hands together.

“Yes! I mean, yes, of course, we don’t want those gummy bears to tempt you off your strict diet. We’ll eat them for you, Peepers, because we’re such good friends like that.” Hater clapped Peepers on the back.

“That’s not necessary!” Peepers shouted but it was too late, the two were already racing down the hall towards his room. “Stay out of my room!” Peepers chased after them. Wander followed at a leisurely pace.

When they arrived, Sylvia and Hater had already both eaten a handful of his gummy bears. “Oh my grop!” Sylvia’s eyes were wide. “Are these infused with alcohol?”

“Huh, now I understand your meetings a little more,” Hater commented as he chewed and grabbed another handful.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #5 Werewolves  
> Warnings: None

“They all look weird. What’s wrong with them?” Hater whispered as he crouched down at Wander’s level.

“Hater, don’t be rude; stop staring! We just got here a little earlier than expected.” Wander pointedly looked away and up into the stars they had just come from. “The moon will be coming out shortly and then they’ll all be good to go. Then we can have fun!”

“I still don’t understand what we’re doing here.” Hater crossed his arms. Then he dug into his pocket. “And why did I need to bring this—whoa, what’s going on?” Hater’s eyes widened as the beings around them begin to moan and collapse to the ground.

“It’s starting,” Wander solemnly explained. “This is the painful part, but they always reassure me that it’s worth it.” Wander looked away as backs began to bend in unnatural ways.

“Cool,” Hater watched with rapt attention at the transformations happening before his very eyes. It didn’t take long and in less than a minute, the aliens before them were covered from head to toe in fur with glowing yellow eyes and dripping fangs poking out of their elongated snouts. “Aw, look at all the puppies! I mean, uh,” Hater coughed into his hand and then remembered what he had pulled out of his pocket earlier. “Oh, now it makes sense why you wanted me to bring a tennis ball.”

“Ball?” One of the nearest aliens asked, his head snapping towards Hater’s direction.

“Ball?” The word began to echo and soon a crowd was standing before Hater. They all came up to Hater’s shoulders when they stood on their hind legs. They towered over Wander but he didn’t seem concerned as he climbed up onto Hater’s shoulders with his own supply of tennis balls.

“Alright, fellows, who’s ready to play fetch?” Wander declared, holding one tennis ball up above his hat.

“Ball, ball! Fetch, play fetch! Get the ball!” Cries rose from the crowd along with a few barks and eager yips. 

“Go fetch!” Wander’s arms became a blur as he launched one tennis ball after another in all directions imaginable. The crowd took off, happily chasing down the bouncing balls, their tags wagging merrily. Some ran on two feet but most seemed to prefer to use all four for the fastest results.

“Go on, Hater,” Wander encouraged. “Throw it. They love play time!”

Hater glanced around to see one tiny alien left and bouncing in front of him with an eager grin. It was almost as cute as Captain Tim. “Alright, little fellow, go get it!” Hater grinned as he tossed the ball and watched the alien bound after it. Hater felt Wander’s furry chin bump against his forehead. 

“See, helping others have fun can be fun.” Wander informed.

“Well, I’ve got to admit this is much better than playing Bingo at that last planet. It smelled like moth balls on there.” Hater grimaced.

“It’s still a better smell than when it rains on this planet,” Wander assured.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #6: Maze  
> Warnings: None  
> Mentions of Labyrinth movie characters

“Getting out of this will be a snap.” Peepers emphasized his words by snapping his fingers. “We simply follow this wall all the way through and then we’ll get to the end.”

“Are we sure this is a maze and not a labyrinth?” Sylvia asked, looking around at the tall walls and the plants scaling them. “I’m pretty sure that guy in the tight pants called it a labyrinth which means we’ll only be led into the middle.”

“Middle, end, whatever! It doesn’t matter where we end up, as long as we get to Hater in time.” Peepers began to walk, one hand touching the wall to his left.

“And Wander,” Sylvia narrowed her eyes. “As long as we get to Hater and Wander in time.”

“Right, right, and Wander too.” Peepers waved his hand and then worriedly placed it back on the wall. “Stick to my plan, Zbornak, and we’ll be there in a jiffy. It’s foolproof.”

Three hours later, Peepers had to admit his plan wasn’t truly foolproof. “How was I supposed to know the walls moved?” Peepers shouted angrily.

Sylvia rubbed at her temples. “Alright, we’ve still got ten hours. That’s plenty of time to save Wander and Hater. Your plan didn’t work so now it’s my turn.”

“You have a plan?” Peepers asked disbelievingly.

“I’ll let you know this isn’t the first maze I’ve beaten. Although, this approach will be a little different.” She cracked her knuckles with a grin. 

An hour, and many damaged walls later, Sylvia and Peepers stood in the middle of an odd masquerade ball. Sylvia shook her hands out, trying to get the sting out of her knuckles. “Huh, I honestly didn’t see this coming.”

“I’m not surprised. I’m also not surprised at that,” Peepers pointed to the middle of the ball where Wander and Hater were dancing. The self-proclaimed king of the goblins was dancing beside them. His dance partner was a girl wearing a large, fluffy white dress that looked similar to the dress Wander was wearing at the moment. “My rescues are never appreciated.”

“Yeah, but now that we’re here, we can make those two start helping in their own rescue to make it go quicker. Ooh, but only after I check out the buffet table.” Sylvia headed towards the food, already licking her lips and rubbing her hands together.

Sighing, Peepers looked around. He counted backwards from one hundred, then he counted forwards. When he finished, he took out his blaster and shot three warning blasts into the ceiling. “I have had enough of this weird world. My friends and I are leaving! Wander too,” because he was never going to call Wander his friend. “The next time you want to invite them to a party, you send an invitation like a normal person. Lord Hater, sir, we’re leaving, now!”

Hater glanced down at Wander who shrugged his shoulders in the ridiculously puffy sleeves of his dress. “Yeah, alright, this party was lame anyways. See ya, Jareth.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #7: Phobia Friday #1 Wander

“No way,” Hater tossed a handful of popcorn into his mouth. “I just don’t believe it. He’s fearless. I mean, he’s looked death in the eyes, i.e., me, so many times with a big, stupid smile on his face!”

Sylvia wiped a piece of popcorn from her face with a glare. “I’m telling you, he’s not afraid of people because he always believes in the best of people. But he does get scared and that forest gave him the heebie jeebies.” Sylvia pulled the bowl away from Hater to grab some for herself before it was gone. 

“But he’s a hippy,” Peepers narrowed his eyes. “He loves nature and that’s essentially what forests are; nature. Why would he be afraid of trees?”

Sylvia shrugged. “Look, I really don’t know what to tell you guys. Wander does get scared and he was terrified of that forest we traveled through. Believe me or not, but it’s the truth.”

“It is the truth,” Wander confirmed as he entered the room. He sat three more bowls of different snacks down on the table and took his spot on the couch between Hater and Sylvia. “I’m not fearless, Hater, and hat forest really did scare me.”

“But why?” Hater asked, taking a bowl for himself and settling it on his lap. “You’ve been on Dominator’s ship a ton of times and that didn’t scare you.”

“I was bit scared on Dominator’s ship the first time too,” Wander corrected. He rubbed his chin. “I can’t really say what scared me in that forest, just something there didn’t feel right to me. I had a bad feeling deep in my gutty-works that something was sending out some pretty bad vibes in that forest. Then we started to see Phantom Mimes and it did prove that there was something wrong.”

“Phantom Mimes scared you more than me electrocuting you to death?” Hater sounded unconvinced. “What were they going to do? Put you in an invisible box? Ooh, scary.” He rolled his eyes.

“It wasn’t the Phantom Mimes themselves, it was what they represented; my fears. As I started to get scared and started to stop thinking rationally, more of them started to pop up.” Wander explained. “Fears just start to build up and up until you get so scared that almost everything seems terrifying even when it normally isn’t.”

“But what brought on the first fear?” Peepers asked. “What were you so afraid of?”

Wander smiled sadly and clapped his shoes together. “I was afraid I might get lost in the forest. A big forest like that made me think of how easy it would be to accidentally, well, wander off from Sylvia and never see her again.” Wander wrapped his arms around Sylvia and she turned to hold him against herself. “I didn’t want to lose her.”

“That’s stupid; like Sylvia would have let you get lost in some woods. She would have torn down all those trees if she had to find you.” Hater crossed his arms over his chest.

“I know, but, well, sometimes things happen and you don’t realize how far away you can get from home until you try to retrace your steps but only end up getting yourself even farther. Then you spend years trying to get back but when you finally do, that place has changed or everyone has left, maybe even because they went looking for you. Getting lost can be very dangerous,” Wander’s voice ended on a whisper.

“Oh, buddy,” Sylvia squeezed him tighter. 

Wander looked around to see that both Hater and Peepers were watching him. “Oh,” he grinned and his voice picked up an octave. “But getting lost can sometimes lead to great adventures too! There are risks but there can also be excitement.” He assured. Wander released Sylvia and stood up. “So, who’s ready for our movie night? What are we watching?” He reached for the remote and turned on the large screen. “It was your night to pick, right, Hatey? Ooh, this sounds interesting, The Blair Witch Project.”

“Give me that!” Hater snatched the remote out of Wander’s hand and quickly changed the screen. “I don’t want to watch that movie anymore.” He began to scroll through his choices. He growled, frustrated as every movie seemed like an ill-fitting choice. He couldn’t even pick a Disney movie since they all talked about home or family. “All these movies suck! I can’t find a good one. Here, Wander, you pick something tonight.”

“Really? Aw, gee, thanks, Hatey, that’s awfully kind of you.” Wander sat back down on the couch with the remote in his hand.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m the best boyfriend ever. You owe me,” Hater boasted with a wave of his hand.

“Ooh, how about this one? I love classics and it is the right season for something a little spooky.” Wander suggested, looking at the others.

“I’m always up for a good laugh,” Sylvia agreed looking at the title.

“I do like that actor,” Peepers commented.

“I’ve never seen it,” Hater narrowed his eyes. “Is it dumb? If it’s in black and white, it has to be pretty dumb.”

“I think you might enjoy it, sir. There is even some electricity in it.” Peepers mentioned.

“Alright, fine, let’s try this Young Frankenstein movie then.” Hater shrugged.

“It’s pronounced Frankensteen,” Sylvia and Wander said simultaneously then broke out into laughter.

Hater, not understanding the joke, glared. “Whatever, just press play already!” Wander hit the play button and sat the remote down on the table. 

When Hater finished off the last of the popcorn, during the first ten minutes of the movie, he replaced the bowl in his lap with Wander instead. Wander curled up contently against him as Hater ran his fingers absentmindedly through Wander’s fur. 

Wander looked back at Hater as he was fully entranced by the movie. He glanced at Peepers and Sylvia, noticing the way Peepers stroked Sylvia’s tail feathers. Sometimes getting lost was scary, other times it brought a new adventure.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #8: Decorations  
> Warnings: None  
> I am a firm believer that Hater's Birthday takes place on the Day of the Dead. I know this is technically November 1st, but I decided to include it for these October prompts anyways.

“Don’t you think this is a little much, buddy?” Sylvia looked around the Skullship worriedly. She had grown used to the crinkling sound of her steps already. “I’m a bit concerned for the waste of wrapping paper considering, you know, you gift wrapped absolutely everything on the Skullship.” She eyed the hallway which had red wrapping paper with black polka dots covering every inch.

“It’s all recycled paper and I’ll make sure to see that it all gets recycled again.” Wander insisted. 

Sylvia stopped at a Watchdog standing before Hater’s door. “Oh come on, Wander, really?” The poor Watchdog was wrapped as well, complete with a black bow on top.

“I do admit, I got a little over-enthusiastic.” Wander smiled and patted the Watchdog on the shoulder. “But Dave did give me permission.”

“I’m a gift!” Dave’s muffled reply sounded cheerful.

Sylvia looked at Dave to the wrapping paper in Wander’s hand. “This is what you need my help with, isn’t it?” She narrowed her eyes suspiciously. 

“Well I can’t wrap myself,” Wander grinned sheepishly. “I did try.” He pressed his finger to his mouth and opened Hater’s door. Sylvia shook her head but followed quietly.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Hater opened his eyes and already decided that this was the worst birthday ever. Everything he could see in his room had been covered in wrapping paper, including his bed. He has suspected that his boyfriend would go out for decorating for his birthday considering this was Wander he was talking about who never did anything half-heartedly.

“How did he wrap this while I was sleeping?” Hater asked aloud as he stared at each individually wrapped blanket and pillow. His horns had torn through one of the pillow’s wrappings already.

“You’re a deep sleeper.” 

Hater frowned and reached for the lamp, which was also wrapped. Tearing off the paper, he turned on the light to illuminate the whole room. “This is probably a fire hazard,” he muttered, not particularly caring since it wouldn’t be the first time his ship caught on fire. 

Ah, there was the source of his irritation. Standing in the corner of his room was a Wander shaped wrapped image, complete with the hat and hands wide open for a hug. Hater sighed and slid out of bed. He stared at Captain Tim, who had also somehow managed to be wrapped as his colorful legs scurried across the floor blindly. Hater unwrapped his first and was thanked with a deadly screech and scratches to his face. Then he continued over to Wander.

“Happy Birthday, Hater!” Wander shouted. “I’ve got your gift waiting for you when you unwrap it!”

“It’s a hug, isn’t it?” Hater sighed.

“It’s a hug and kiss!” Wander agreed.

Hater nodded and left his room without unwrapping Wander. “If I go into the kitchen and find every piece of food wrapped, I’m going to light the Skullship on fire.”

“I’ll warn Sylvia to grab the fire extinguisher.” Wander commented as he was left alone in Hater’s bedroom.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #9: Haunted House  
> Warnings: None

“Hello, is anyone home?” Wander asked, sticking his head in through the open doorway. “We got a little confused and lost track of time. Do you mind if we camp out in your yard?”

“Forget that; I’m not sleeping out in the rain.” Hater pushed the door the rest of the way open. “We’re going to crash here. This place is huge; they have to have spare rooms.”

“I’ve got to agree with Hater on this one, buddy, I’d rather sleep in here than out there in the rain.” Sylvia started to shake off the rain from her body.

Peepers eyed the amount of dust in the entryway. “I don’t think anyone lives here so they can’t mind if we stay for just one night.”

“I’m going upstairs to look for a bed.” Hater raced up the stairs.

“I’m going to see if there’s anything in the kitchen or if the stove works at least.” Sylvia motioned to one side and headed into the side hallway.

Wander smiled at Peepers. He sighed. “I’m just going to go anywhere else.” Peepers left Wander, heading in the opposite direction of Sylvia.

Looking around the entryway, Wander grinned. “This is a beautiful house. I bet there’s a lot of history here too. Yep, probably lots of stories to be shared that I would love to hear!”

“Do you mean that? Are you really interested in hearing my stories?” Wander grinned as he looked to the front door. A pair of eyes had emerged over the doorway.

“Of course! I’m always up for a good tale and you seem like you have lots to share. I hope you don’t mind my friends and I staying for the night. I’ll help clean you up or anything else in exchange.” Wander offered.

“Well, I would love a little dusting done, if you don’t mind.” The house’s eyes glanced around. “I’m afraid I’ve let myself go a little since my last guests.”

“No problem!” Wander was already pulling a feather duster out of his hat. “So, what were your last guests like?”

“They were dreadfully rude and so I had to,” the house stopped and seemed to frown. Then it began to giggle. Wander was about to ask what was funny when he heard Hater’s screams. A moment later, Hater raced down the stairs.

“The walls are dripping green ooze! It’s actually kind of cool or it would have been if it hadn’t gotten on my robe!” Hater tugged on his robe to show the green droplets on it. Sylvia came sprinting out as the same time as Peepers, both of them screaming about flying items. 

Wander giggled. “Oh, I see now! You like to play tricks, huh?” Wander asked the house.

“Only when my guests don’t use their manners,” the house informed.

Hater followed Wander’s gaze to the eyes on the wall. “Of course,” he sighed. “We find a haunted house and Wander makes friends with it.” He groaned and rubbed at his face. “Just typical.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #10: Monster Monday #2 Sylvia  
> Warnings: Minor character death mentioned, kinda?

The hat had to go first. She knew that was the key to her success. Once she got rid of that flarf-narbler then there would be no stopping her. It was easy enough to do it too. After all, the hat had no protection other than Wander.

“Hey, buddy, can I see your hat?” She asked, reaching over the fire for it.

“Sure thing! Although, if you need another marshmallow, I still have plenty in my bag to share.” Wander grinned and rattled the bag before removing his hat and passing it to her.

“Thanks, pal.” She held the hat over the fire before dropping it in.

“My hat!” Wander’s eyes went wide and he dashed for the fire but she had predicted this. She tackled him to the ground before he could reach the hat. She used her advanced size and weight to keep him pinned down, ignoring his cries and wiggling under her.

The fire exploded behind them, shooting high into the sky and licking at her body despite her distance. She glanced over her shoulder at the now smoldering hat. It had apparently tried to use water to douse the fire roasting it. Unfortunately for the hat, she was great at thinking ahead and making strategic plans. That was why she had used an oil-based fire. 

“Now that that’s out of the way, I only have to deal with you.” She turned her grin down onto Wander. He already had tears falling from his eyes. 

“Why did you do that?” He asked her, his voice cracking as he stared up at her with wet, wide eyes.

“Don’t you know how much you’re worth right now by the villains? Turning you in will set me up for life! I’ll have enough to buy my own little planet and enough jellyfish pies to satisfy me until the end of the galaxy. No more traveling and sleeping on the ground. No more adventures wasted on helping others. No more risking my life for ungrateful strangers.” Her grin widened. “And once I turn you over, there will be no more wandering annoyances in my life.”

“But you were my best buddy,” Wander trembled. 

“I don’t need you as my buddy! I only need to look out for myself!” She tossed her head back and began to laugh, her eyes glowing green as she continued to laugh harder.

“Sylvia, wake up!” As her eyes glowed, her teeth began to sharpen. “Sylvia, please, wake up!” Her nails were growing into pointy daggers. Her hair was starting to fall out. “Sylvia!”

She jerked awake and found herself underneath Wander. “Wander?”

“Are you awake now? You were shaking and crying in your sleep.” Wander frowned. She wrapped her arms around him and held him to her still shaking body. “Bad dream, buddy?”

“Yeah, the worst with a real scary monster.” She sniffled.

“But there’s no monster around that you can’t defeat!” Wander encouraged, squeezing her back.

“Sometimes, pal, it’s you that beats them.” Sylvia smiled.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #11: Baking  
> Warnings: None

“So why are we baking cupcakes?” Hater asked, stirring the bowl. The only reason he was helping was so that he could lick the spoon when the baking was done. He kept stirring, staring at the concoction that would soon be hitting his taste buds. Everyone knew that the batter was the best part and he was not going to miss out on it.

“Because I’m going to decorate them to look like graveyards. That’s why we iced all these rectangular cookies to say RIP on them. I’ll put some green icing on them when they’re finished, then we add the cookie tombstones and maybe one of these cute little pumpkin candies.” Wander pointed at the waiting cupcake toppings. 

“Are they for the party too?” Hater frowned. “Or do I actually get to eat these when they’re finished?”

“Of course they’re for the party, Hatey!” Wander chuckled.

Hater groaned. “But I thought the other desserts were for the party!” 

The ‘dirt pudding’ had been the easiest to make; smashed cookies into a chocolate pudding with gummy worms thrown in. The chocolate covered pretzels were simply dipping them into white chocolate and then drizzling it with orange, red, and green colored chocolate. 

Then Wander had started the complicated desserts. He had made a round, pumpkin flavored cake, stuffed it with cream-cheese filling, and then decorated it to look like a pumpkin. Hater had de-cored about eight dozen apples so Wander could stuff them with an apple cobbler. Currently, Wander was adding candied spiders onto each cookie that had been decorated to look like a web.

Wander didn’t even look up from his task as he responded. “The more choices at the party, the better! Then, once we finish the desserts, we can start on the main courses. I’m going to make a thick pumpkin-squash soup, monster looking sandwiches, wrapped hot dogs and tofu dogs that will end up looking like mummies, an eyeball and witch’s hair dish which is really just spaghetti and meatballs that we’ll color and--”

“Whoa, whoa, what is this ‘we’ business? I said I’d help for dessert only. After I get to lick the spoon I’m out! I’m not spending my whole day baking for a dumb party.” Hater protested.

“Okay, thanks for all your help today, Hater!” Wander grinned.

“Wait, what does that mean? You want me to leave and not help. Do you think I won’t be able to handle cooking all of that? I’ll let you know my cooking skills are unparalleled to anything you’ve seen before.” Hater boasted.

“That’s for sure,” Peepers remarked from the hallway as he passed by.

“Shut up, Peepers! That’s it! I’m going to see to it that I have a helping hand in every dish for this stupid party!” Hater declared.

“That’s great! Alright, go ahead and pour that batter into the cupcake pans.” Wander began to hum another spooky song under his breath. After Hater closed the oven door, he licked his spoon and hummed along.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #12: Vampire  
> Warnings: None

“I once dated a vampire,” Sylvia nodded towards the table where a vampire was sitting and holding a girl’s hand. 

Peepers glanced at the couple. “I take it there’s a reason you’re sharing this information with me.”

Sylvia rolled her eyes. “Yeah, it’s so I could make the pun about her sucking about as much as you suck at small talk, Pipsqueak.” 

“Hilarious,” Peepers stared into his tea and stirred it absentmindedly with his spoon. He glanced at the vampire again. “Did you really date a vampire or was that simply for the chance to make a pun?”

“Hm? Now you’re actually interested?” Sylvia smirked as she teased him. “But no, it’s the truth. It didn’t last very long. She was nice, but we just lived different lives. Also, she left way too many hickeys on my neck. It was rather bothersome.”

Peepers chuckled and Sylvia grinned. “How about you? Ever date another outside of your species?”

“Oh well,” Peepers shrugged his shoulders. “There was one other before you, but otherwise most of my dating history was with other Watchdogs.” He tore a bit of his muffin off without any attention to actually eat the piece. “We never do this.”

“We both agreed this coffee shop was the best bet for a quick breakfast while Wander helps Hater complete his good-deed on this planet.” Sylvia reminded.

“No, I mean, we never talk about our past before we started to date one another.” Peepers corrected.

Sylvia took a deep sip of her coffee. “Sorry, that’s my fault. I don’t like to bring up the past that much. There’s not a whole lot in my life before I met Wander that I like to remember. But that doesn’t mean you can’t ask me about anything, if you want to.” 

Peepers nodded, saving that opportunity for a later time. He currently didn’t have any questions to ask her. “What do you think Wander has in mind for Hater’s good deed on this planet?”

“Considering that this planet is all about dark, dreary days with most of the people living here looking, well, surprisingly like Hater,” Sylvia trailed off into her thoughts before she grinned. “I’m sure Wander will have Hater reading to a group of children in the town center.”

“Pfft, no way. Hater was awful at the story time attempt on that last planet.” Peepers waved his hand into the air. “He got too into character and ended up scaring them all.”

“Exactly,” Sylvia chuckled. “That’s why this would be the perfect place to try again. Hater’s chances of scaring the children of this planet are much lower because half of them are already skeletons of some kind. Besides, I already see Wander gathering a group of kiddos.” She pointed out the window where Wander passed by in the midst of a flock of different children. 

“That means we have enough time to finish our breakfast.” Peepers continued to eat his muffin. Then he reached across the table and took Sylvia’s hand.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #13: Favorite Spooky WOY Character  
> Warning: None

“Tim-Tim!” 

Captain Tim jolted awake and began to hiss as the large skeleton ran at him. The skeleton had its arms open so Tim knew he was about to be embraced against his will and hugged against a boney chest. Luckily, he knew how to maneuver around those bones. He also knew how hard he had to bite down in order to get to the juicy marrow. He just had to remember not to attack the fake arm or else he’ll end up getting shocked again.

“Aw, he missed you, Hatey! Look at all the kisses he’s giving you. I’m a little jealous.” Tim froze and released his current mouthful. He knew that voice. It haunted him still. Growling, Tim turned from the skeleton and wondered about the benefits of trying to attack the furry one again. It seemed distracted with it’s high pitched chortling as it continued to coo to the skeleton.

Tim looked from the skeleton to the furry one for a moment as they both continued to make their nonsensical chattering at one another. Then he pounced. “No, no, bad Captain Tim! Stop trying to steal Wander’s heart! That belongs to me!” The skeleton was prying him away from his prey just when he had almost been successful.

Tim screeched his unholy rage at being denied his sought after prize of the furry one’s beating organs. He raised his claws and swiped furiously in all directions but was kept at an arm’s length until his fury died down to the usual, milder seething anger. 

“Are you okay, Wander?” The skeleton’s hands were holding tightly onto him, keeping Tim at bay.

“I’m fine, Hatey. I know Captain Tim didn’t mean any harm.” The furry one patted Tim and he let out a short hiss but he knew his threat fell flat. His anger had been seeped out of him for the moment. “That’s just how this cute little guy expresses himself. Besides, how can I be upset when his actions made you say the most romantic thing?” 

“Uh, what did I say?” The skeleton shifted his hands and Tim took his chance to jump down from his boney prison. 

He scurried across the floor to the hole in the wall he had spent minutes creating. Scurrying down the hallway, he hissed at the multiple small prey that leaped and ran in terror from him. The useless pawns always helped his righteous anger return when he chose to chase them down.

But tonight Tim had other plans. He continued to move his multiple legs until he came to his destination. Baring his teeth, Tim attacked. He ripped, he shredded, he spat, growled, chewed, and generally just made a mess of things. He felt satisfied and settled down for a quick, victorious nap.

He was rudely awoken much sooner than planned by a loud shriek of rage.

“Peepers, what’s wrong?” 

“That flarbing monstrosity ripped apart my pillows!” Tim stretched lazily and quickly blew a feather off one of his legs.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #14: Phobia Friday #2 Sylvia  
> Warnings: None

“One, two, three, push!” Hater grunted and shoved with all his might. Then he groaned loudly and pressed himself against the large boulder. He made a spark with his hand. “Well, we’re stuck, but at least I can make some light. Huh, not much space in here. How long do you think it’ll take before Wander and Peepers save us?” Hater turned to look at Sylvia. “Uh, Zbornak, you okay? You’re breathing kinda heavy.”

“Is this boulder moving on us? It feels like it’s pushing us even closer together now.” She turned around and began to push on the boulder again.

“Hey, if we couldn’t move that thing together, then there’s no way you’re going to get that boulder to move just by yourself. Sit down already and just let Wander be the rescuer for once. I mean, you’ve saved him enough times it’s only fair you let him save you too.” Hater pointed out.

“Okay, but, uh, could you stop lighting this place up?” Sylvia asked. “It’s really making me nervous.”

“I’m not going to shock you. I have better control over my powers than to do that.” Hater glared.

“I’m not nervous about you, bonehead.” She was glaring right back. “It’s just that,” her eyes closed and she smacked the boulder blocking the cave’s entrance in frustration. “We’re in a really small space and we’re stuck here. But if I can’t see the limited space, then I can trick myself into thinking that there’s more space in here than there actually is. Okay? So just, turn off the lights already. Please.”

Hater glance around the cave. There really wasn’t much room. He could stand up and maybe walk five steps before he reached the other wall. They had only ended up here because he had slipped and taken Sylvia with him. He supposed he owed her this favor. 

“Sorry.” He folded his hands back into his lap. “So, uh, you don’t like small spaces?”

“No, I’m positively terrified. That’s right, big brave Sylvia is afraid of being in small spaces. Go ahead, Hater, make fun of me. I honestly couldn’t feel any worse than I already do.” Sylvia was still breathing heavily. Her voice was the only audible thing in the tiny cave.

“I’m not gonna make fun of you,” Hater admitted in a small voice. “Have you always been afraid of this?”

“Ever since I was a little girl. That’s why traveling in an open Orbble through the giant galaxy with Wander was a very enticing offer. I like being able to see the open sky above my head at all times.” Sylvia explained. “Can you just talk about something, please? It’ll get my mind off all of this.”

“Um, sure, yeah, okay.” Hater shifted and accidentally brushed against her hand. At first he tugged it away, then he sighed and placed his hand deliberately on hers. If she was used to Wander’s physical affection, then this would probably help too. “So, my first date with Wander.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #15: Scary Movie Marathon  
> Warnings: None
> 
> Author's Note: Sorry this is late! I went to away this weekend with my girlfriend and the internet wasn't working with me on Saturday night at the hotel after we finished at the amusement park. I wasn't feeling like trying to figure it out so you get this prompt now and the next prompt very soon.

“Alright, I think we should stop it here.” Sylvia stood up from the couch and plopped her empty bowl down on the table. “As much as I enjoy fake blood, and I do, this was too much.”

“What? But that was just the first movie! Why would we, oh.” Peepers sighed as he looked to the other end of the couch. Under the thin protection of a fluffy blanket, Lord Hater and Wander were wrapped around each other with wide eyes still staring at the large, now blank, screen. Peepers rubbed at his head. “Well, good thing the bed is big enough to fit four,” he mumbled to himself. Clearing his throat, he spoke louder, “Sir, why don’t we watch a different movie instead of what we had planned next?”

“N-no way, P-pe-Peepers! Those movies are all in order from the scariest horror movies list that Awesome sent me as a challenge. I have to watch them all or else Awesome will think I’m a scardy-baby!” Hater’s teeth kept chattering. 

“Well Mr. Not-Scardy-Baby, Wander is terrified already after just that first one.” Sylvia pointed out. “Are you really going to force him to watch more in this state?”

Wander was inside Hater’s cloak with just the top of his head and his round, horrified eyes peeking out. His arms were wrapped tight around Hater’s ribs and providing a fuzzy comfort to the skeleton as he kept his hands wrapped around his chest. “So much violence,” Wander whispered.

“I suppose we’ll have to stop because of Wander then,” Peepers suggested. “Awesome probably just wouldn’t understand making sacrifices in order to support your significant other, but you can try to explain it to him, sir.”

“Ooh, that’s good, Peepers.” Hater grinned. “Yeah, alright, new movies for our marathon then. Can we play the Nightmare Before Christmas next? And after that I want to watch The Book of Life! Then Corpse Bride.”

“Great suggestions, sir.” Peepers began to prepare the movies. Sylvia took her spot on the couch back.

“I do like this movie. I used to have a crush on the main actor when I was younger,” Wander admitted from Hater’s robes. 

“The skeleton?” Peepers rolled his eye. “Of course skeletons are your type.” He angrily ate a mouthful of sticky, crunchy snacks.

“That’s a ‘used to’ as, like, in the past, right?” Hater asked, staring down at Wander.

“Oh of course, Hatey, you know you’re the only skeleton for me now!” Wander reassured, pressing a quick kiss to the underside of Hater’s jawbone, which he could easily reach without moving from his safe and comfortable spot. “Besides, he’s very similar to his character.”

“You met him in real life, why am I not surprised?” Hater grumbled. “So, what, he’s a curious, well meaning, great leader in real life too?”

“Yep,” Wander nodded.

“Yeah, not Wander’s type at all.” Sylvia smirked. Peepers snorted into his hands and glanced at Hater.

Hater stared silently for a moment until the comment processed. “Shut up!”


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #16: Watchdog Costume Party  
> Warnings: None

“What are you two supposed to be exactly?” Sylvia stared down at the two Watchdogs. She knew Larry and David were a new couple and had been excited to do a couple costume. She also knew that Wander had helped them figure out the costume but she had been expecting something with less leather. David raised a hand and was about to begin to explain when Sylvia shook her head. “Never mind, I don’t want to know. Here are your badges, the drinks are in the back, snack table is to the left of the dance floor; have fun!” She waved them into the large party room without another word.

Sighing, she looked at the empty hallway. Everyone else was already inside enjoying the party. It was in full swing and she could hear the loud music blasting through the walls and see the multicolor lights slipping through the doors. 

“Of all the times he’s late,” Sylvia tapped irritably at the table she had sat down behind. 

Wander popped his head out as if he was able to sense someone not having a good time and needed to try and help. “Do you want me to take over? You can head in and I’ll let you know when he arrives.” He offered.

“Nah, buddy, you get back in there and keep Bonehead company. I’ll be alright.” Sylvia smiled reassuringly. 

Wander looked unconvinced but he heard a familiar cry of “Has anyone seen Wander?” and ducked back into the party.

“I even got into these old bounty hunter clothes just for him.” She grumbled unhappily once she was safely alone to complain. She smacked her head down against the table and threw her hands up into the air.

A silver chain snapped around her wrist and she looked up. “Excuse me, Miss, but I’m placing you under arrest for being too beautiful.” Peepers stood before her in his space officer outfit, complete with baton that he was spinning lazily with the hand not holding onto her shackle.

Sylvia snorted. “Are you late because you were trying to think of that line?”

Peepers flushed. “Shut up, Zbornak!” 

“Oh Grop that’s too good.” She pounded the table with her free hand as she busted her gut laughing. 

Peepers fumed. “Forget I even said anything. I knew this party was a stupid idea. I’m going back up to my room to get some work done.”

“Hey now,” Sylvia used her shackle to tug Peepers to her. She lifted him off the ground so they were eye level. “You promised me a night of dancing and fun if I let you pick the costumes. You wanted to see me as a ‘bad guy’ and I delivered. As a bounty hunter, you better believe I get my end of the bargain. So you’d better pay what’s due to me and get ready to dance, Pipsqueak.” 

Peepers nodded. “Yes, mam.”

“Good.” She pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “Now let’s get this party started.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #17: Monster Monday #3 Peepers  
> Warning: Talk of starvation, mentioning of cannibalism and child neglect

Spend an hour of your day to observe the Watchdogs. If you watch them while they’re at work, you might find them to be intimidating at their posts. Or you might find them gossiping and slacking off. If you watch them during a training simulation, you might think they are fierce. But if you find them during their breaks then you’ll see that the only thing that they can demolish is a plate of nachos.

Watchdogs aren’t monsters. They are far from the scariest species in the galaxy. Some might even think they’re cute with their petite sizes and bodies. Out of all the Watchdogs, there is one that is the smallest. He is very hard for you to miss.

If you gathered the courage to ask the Commander why he is so small, he’ll probably blast you with his laser. Most never ask again after that. But if you do, and you luck out to catch him in a particularly talkative mood, he might even answer you. If he ever told you his story, it might go something like this:

“Our planet was defenseless. Other species took our resources and left us with nothing. Food was scarce. If you wanted to eat you had to be tough. I wasn’t tough. I didn’t get much food while I was growing so I remained small. When you grow up in an uncivilized civilization, then brains won’t get you very far. It’s brawns that will keep your stomach filled.”

But you might comment that it’s hard to picture the Watchdogs as ruthless savages out for only themselves. They share so easily and are so happy to please and help. If you doubt his story, you might ask if he’s telling the truth. He might answer like this:

“I was lying, of course. Bad guys lie all the time. I wasn’t starved because of the other Watchdogs hogging all the food. I could have tricked any Watchdog into handing over their food. I was starved because my parents couldn’t always afford enough food. Dad was off fighting in the war. Mom worked two jobs to try and support me and my five siblings. I was the oldest so I gave the others what little food we had. I was responsible for them after all.”

That sounds very selfless. But when you ask for his siblings’ names, he’ll stare at you for a moment, as though thinking. You might get irritated at that point. You might demand the truth. It might go like this:

“We as a race could never manage on our own. We couldn’t grow any food on our desolate planet. There weren’t many other creatures to hunt. Until Lord Hater showed up, we did what we had to in order to survive. Do you know the difference between cannibalism and survival cannibalism? I do. I was not that desperate to survive.”

You don’t question him anymore. Not after that. You stop asking questions. You have your answers and the monstrous truth.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #18: Caramel Apples  
> Warnings: None

“That’s not how you say it!” Hater argued.

“Does it really matter how it’s pronounced, sir?” Peepers asked, desperate to end this new argument before it began. Sylvia and Hater hadn’t stopped snapping at each other all day. Sylvia seemed to be in a bad mood and Hater was always in a bad mood. 

“No, it just matters that she’s wrong.” Hater pointed accusingly at Sylvia.

“Move that finger before you lose it,” Sylvia growled.

Hater narrowed his eyes. “Oh yeah? And what are you going to do about it, Zbornak?” He began to charge his hands, electricity dancing off of the pointing finger and dangerously close to Sylvia’s snout.

Rolling up invisible sleeves, Sylvia made a motion to step closer despite how hard Peepers was trying to step between the two. “Come on, can’t we all just get along?” Peepers shouted desperately. “Where is that peace-loving weirdo when you need him?” He looked around for Wander but couldn’t find him anywhere in sight. “Lord Hater, sir, please, there’s no reason to pick a fight with your boyfriend’s best friend. Sylvia, please, don’t start punching my boss over something so stupid!”

“What’s going on, buddies?” Wander asked, appearing magically on Hater’s shoulders. He swung his legs and grinned at them all as if he wasn’t able to sense the rising tension about to break out. “I got us all some special, tasty treats! I saw them in the windowsill over there.” He held out four apples on sticks. One was decorated to look like an eyeball, one was covered in red candy, one covered in caramel, and the last was covered in chocolate fudge with Halloween sprinkles.

Hater and Sylvia both took a step back away from each other. “Ooh, thanks, pal, I have been a bit hungry.” Sylvia smiled and reached for an apple. The same apple that Hater was reaching for. When their hands touched, they both stopped to stare at one another. 

“He obviously bought this one with me in mind,” Hater claimed.

“No way, he knows that they’re my favorite!” Sylvia shouted in protest.

“Should I go trade one of the others? I’m sure they won’t mind or I could just buy another one,” Wander suggested. “Whoa!” He was startled when Hater picked him up and set him on the ground.

“That’s it, Zbornak, you’ve had this coming all day!” Hater challenged.

“Bring it on, Bonehead!” Sylvia jumped him.

“How do we stop them?” Wander asked Peepers.

Peepers sighed and took the apple they were fighting over. Then he took a large bite out of it. Hater and Sylvia both stopped mid-punch to stare at him. “Peepers!” They both cried out.

“That was mine! Argh, you always ruin everything.” Hater complained.

“You selfish jerk, I can’t believe you did that when you know I wanted that one.” Sylvia was flabbergasted.

“He does this all the time,” Hater sighed and grabbed a different apple. Sylvia took another one. “This one time,” he began.

Peepers sighed with relief.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #19: Ghosts  
> Warning: Murdering mentioned

Hater has a lot of skeletons in his closet. He’s heard that joke before. It doesn’t make it less true. He’s a galactic dictator. Sure, he’s mean, self-centered, emotionally stunted, and an overall bully, but he’s never intentionally murdered people. He’s hurt people with the intent to see them bleed and suffer, he just never wanted to see someone die because of him.

But accidents happen. 

Peepers reassured him that they happen to all the great villains of the galaxy.

Those accidents are what haunt him at night. 

During the day he has the best defense; his ego. He’s too important to think of the past. He always looks to the future. He can’t be bothered with past mistakes when he has so much left to do with his awesome plans and powers. But at night he’s defenseless against his own mind.

When he’s asleep, his subconscious brings up the memories. The sights, the sounds of screams, and his brain takes it all a step further to make those moments seem even worse. They can be in technicolor, flashing before his eyes as he desperately wishes to look away. Sometimes he’s seeing all the deaths at one time. Sometimes he’s seeing the people he actually cares about dying in the same way and that’s even worse even if it’s not true. When he’s asleep, everything seems true.

The worst ones started when he started to become, well, he’ll never admit to being a ‘good guy’ but he’ll use Wander’s words, ‘a better person.’ Now that he no longer has the intentions to be cruel and watch suffer, now that he’s trying to be helpful and solve his problems through nonviolent manners. His dreams are worse than ever. It’s almost like his subconscious wants him to return to evil. His brain is showing him and reminding him why he can never possibly become a good guy. 

He’s done too much evil to ever be redeemed. He’s done the unforgiveable. He’s taken away someone’s brother, father, mother, sister, friend, whatever title they might have held. He’s taken them away from their loved ones forever. Not even Wander can help him make up for those crimes.

That’s why he refuses to talk about the past with Wander. Well, at least why he won’t talk about those past events. They can’t be fixed so it’s best not to dwell on it. Besides, it would just upset Wander. It might even make Wander change his mind about Hater. He doesn’t think he’ll be able to handle having Wander look at him differently.

It’s hard enough as it is at night, when the nightmares make him wake up screaming or in a cold sweat, to brush off Wander’s hands and retreat to the bathroom alone. He can’t accept Wander’s help. He can’t talk about it. He won’t talk about it.

He’ll just keep pushing those skeletons deeper into his closet. He’ll keep two steps ahead of his past mistakes. He’ll continue to live with the ghosts.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #20: Favorite Spooky WOY Episode  
> Warnings: None

Wander wiped a happy tear from his eye. “Well, Sylvia,” he sniffled, “it’s like they say, if you love something set it free. If it comes back, it’s yours. But if it comes back, tries to rip your face off, stabs you a bunch, and then lays its eggs inside your chest, it wasn’t meant to be.”

They could hear Peepers and the other Watchdogs screaming inside the Skullship.

“Maybe we could visit him sometime?” Wander asked hopefully.

“Absolutely not,” Sylvia shut down as they left in their Orbble. She had enough nightmare fuel after that day already. She had lost count of the amount of times she had felt her heart nearly beat out of her chest. She was also uncomfortable with the amount of ease Wander accepted a terrible creature trying to eat his heart out. But that conversation would be a nightmare for another day.

“Let’s find a friendly, populated planet to settle on for the night, huh, buddy?” Sylvia was ready for a well-deserved night’s rest. If she kept the sounds of Peepers’ undignified screams in her head while she tried to relax then she felt like she could be forgiven for grabbing onto whatever small amount of delight she could find.

“Sounds good to me, Syl.” Wander agreed and pointed out a planet up ahead that was a familiar pit stop for the two of them. “Say, Hater sure did seem excited about Captain Tim, don’t you think?”

“Of course he did. The only one who enjoys seeing the Watchdogs in peril more than me is probably Hater,” Sylvia mumbled with a snort. “I think Captain Tim will fit in perfectly on that monstrous ship. I mean, Captain Tim is basically just lips with legs and the Watchdogs are just eyes with bodies. Put them all together and they almost make a body.” She chuckled to herself at the idea.

“It’s almost as though Hater was happy to have a new pet friend.” Wander mused more to himself than to Sylvia.

She glanced over her shoulder at Wander. She knew that tone of voice. It meant that Wander was beginning to get an idea and when Wander got an idea it normally meant her blood pressure was about to rise. “What are you planning?” She asked.

“Nothing yet,” Wander admitted. “But I think I might be onto something. It might just be the right path to Hater’s heart.”

“I’m pretty sure that bag of bones doesn’t have a heart, buddy.” Sylvia discouraged. “Listen, whatever helpful thoughts you’ve got going in that head of yours can wait at least one day. Tonight I just need a quick supper and a good, safe rest with my best pal in the galaxy.”

“You know, Sylvia, that sounds like the perfect plan to me.” Wander wrapped his arms around her neck from the back as he agreed. 

Sylvia and Wander spent a cozy night and both had a restful sleep. However, the Skullship inhabitants just began their nightmare experience.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #21: Phobia Friday #3 Peepers  
> Warnings: None

Peepers is rational. He has many fears. It’s normal to fear things when one is a very tiny and a rather insignificant being in the large, strange galaxy they live in. The intelligent will admit to having fears because they will be able to plan for ways to overcome those fears. Most of his fears are related.

He fears never being remembered. There are names in the galaxy that will live on for centuries. Take Major Threat, as an example. Even thousands of years after his reign of terror had ended, he is still remembered and respected for his evil actions. But then there are others that reached the pinnacle of being evil but have passed away without being recognized for their deeds. Peepers knows that the way to get remembered is to be so evil that people would fear forgetting him.

Peepers fears never reaching his goal. This fear has a lot to do with Lord Hater’s ineptitude. Unfortunately, he can’t plan against this too well. He can only try his best to keep Lord Hater focused on his grand scheme. But this fear runs into another fear of his. 

He fears Hater becoming good. Lord Hater is Peepers only chance of ruling the galaxy. Hater would be the figurehead but everyone in the galaxy would know who’s plans put him there. They would also be able to tell that Peepers is the puppet master and pulling all the right strings to reshape the galaxy into his desired image. Peepers has no wish to overcome his evil nature. He liked being evil. It brings him great joy. But Lord Hater, as much as he might proclaim otherwise, doesn’t really desire to become the ultimate evil. He just wants a girlfriend or someone to love him unconditionally because his own self-worth is set upon others.

Which wraps up into another fear Peepers has.

He’s afraid that one day when Lord Hater loses control of his temper and hits him, he’ll be hit hard enough to kill him. He’s not afraid of the dying part, oddly enough. He’s more afraid of what that would end up doing to Lord Hater. Without Peepers around, Hater would fall apart quickly. It’s happened before. Peepers being gone for good and Hater knowing that it’s his own fault? That would destroy Hater. He wouldn’t be able to cope with the overwhelming guilt for his actions. He’d isolate himself and everyone else would be too afraid to get close to him. Luckily, Peepers trusts in Hater’s control. Hater would never permanently hurt him.

Peepers also fears ending up alone. This fear has died down ever since a wandering weirdo brought a Zbornak into his life. He knows that she’s loyal. If she likes someone, she’ll stick with them for the rest of their life. It’s a rather nice feeling.

He also fears being stepped on. But that fear is a bit irrational and can be solved by wearing high heeled boots. Also a large, pointy hats.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #22: Campfire Horror Stories  
> Warnings: None  
> The story Sylvia is telling is the urban legend called the Hook or Hookman. The story Wander tells is [The Lottery (1948) by Shirley Jackson.](http://sites.middlebury.edu/individualandthesociety/files/2010/09/jackson_lottery.pdf)

“…but when she turned around to look, there was a hook hanging from the door.” Sylvia ended with a wide grin on her face. Wander was already shaking in Hater’s hood and she felt bad about scaring him.

“You call that a scary story?” Hater complained. “The only thing that’s scared me out here so far is the fact that we have to sleep on the ground instead of my nice, comfy bed. Why can’t we just go sleep in the Skullship tonight?”

“But it’s such a beautiful night, Hatey.” Wander’s voice didn’t hold nearly the amount of conviction it did when he had brought up the idea nearly two hours ago. 

“Ugh, I knew I should have put in a skylight or something,” Hater mumbled.

“You have a scary story, Peeps?” Sylvia asked, ignoring Hater’s usual whining as she reached for her roasting stick. She stuck another marshmallow onto it and held it over the fire. 

“Well, like your story, it’s rather an urban legend so you might know parts of it.” Peepers cleared his throat. “A group of friends were camping out in the woods--”

“Boring!” Hater bellowed.

Peepers sighed. “Do you have a story to tell, sir?” 

“No, but all of your stories are boring. You both can’t tell good stories. Wander, you tell a story. You’re the best at story telling.” Hater praised, glancing sideways to meet Wander’s eyes since he was still sharing Hater’s hood for protection.

“Oh golly, that’s sweet of you to say, Hatey, but I’m not sure I’m very good at telling spooky stories.” Wander wiggled out of his hood and slid down into Hater’s lap. Hater’s hands automatically came to rest on Wander. “Well, I suppose I can try.” 

“This will be good. The horror of the land without hugs,” Peepers elbowed Sylvia in the side. She smirked at his ignorance. Peepers still didn’t know how in character Wander would get when telling stories.

Wander reached into his hat for a flashlight, clicked it on, and held it under his chin. “Our story begins on the morning of June 27th…”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“She screamed as they were upon her. “It isn’t right, it isn’t fair!” Her voice hung in the air before being silenced, forever.” Wander clicked the flashlight off and stepped down off of Hater’s shoulder. “So, what do you all think? Was it okay?”

“Wow,” Peepers’ pupil was wide. “I, uh, honestly didn’t see that coming. It wasn’t scary but it was suspenseful, I’ll give you that.”

“Good story, buddy.” Sylvia complimented. 

“The only thing that makes that story scary is that you probably didn’t make it up but actually saw that happen, didn’t you?” Hater asked, offering a hand as Wander moved off of his shoulder. 

Wander’s expression turned somber. “I wish I had been there earlier, but I can happily say that the lottery no longer takes place on that planet.”

Hater pressed a quick kiss to the top of Wander’s head and Wander smiled up at him.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #23: Pumpkin Carving  
> Warnings: None

“Are you sure about this, buddy? It’s not hurting them?” Sylvia asked, her voice doubtful. 

“Do you really think Wander, of all people, would be telling us to hurt others?” Hater rolled his eyes.

“I know it seems a bit harsh, but we’re helping the Jackos, not hurting them.” Wander assured Sylvia. “I like to come out here each year and lend a hand on carving them new faces. You see, they grow a new head to replace their old one once it rots away. But sometimes, they all rot around the same time and the entire planet is left with new heads but without anyway to see or talk.” While he was explaining, he was busy running his jagged knife through the pumpkin head of the Jacko sitting before him. “See, now he has a mouth!”

“Thank you, Wander, I’ve been stuck like this for two days now.” The Jacko spoke. “It feels good to finally be able to speak again. Wander is right, when it just so happens that our new heads all ripen at the same time, it’s rather problematic to us. We really don’t feel anything either. All our important parts are gases inside our hollow bodies. That’s what you can see glowing through my new mouth.” He opened his mouth wider to show off the flickering light source.

“Now, what shape eyes would you like?” Wander asked.

“Could I get three triangular eyes?” The Jacko requested.

“Sure thing!” Wander looked at the face before deciding on his first cut for a new eye.

“What if we end up making a face that they don’t like?” Peepers asked, staring at the two eyes he had already carved into the Jacko. He hadn’t thought to carve a mouth and ask what the Jacko would prefer.

“That’s the great thing about growing a new head every year,” the Jacko that Hater was carving commented. “If we don’t like the head, then we can always make changes ourselves or we get a new one next year.” Her hands came up. “I like the pointy teeth.”

“Pointy teeth are the best,” Hater agreed. “Now stop moving or else I’m going to mess up your eyes.”

“Oh, this is helpful!” Sylvia smiled as the Jacko handed her a picture. “So, you just want me to do this for your face?” The Jacko nodded. “Alright, kneel down. I can do this, no problem.”

“Is this long enough for your mustache?” Wander asked, holding up a mirror from his hat. 

The Jacko examined his new face. “It’s perfect! Thank you again, Wander. Now I can finally find my family and help carve a new face for my children.” 

“Always happy to help!” Wander moved on to his next Jacko.

“You know,” Hater commented, “this helping thing can be fun sometimes, I guess.” He sighed as he heard Wander’s delightful squeal. “Get back to carving, Wander.” He grumped.

“Okay, Hatey. Mam, would you like heart shaped eyes?” Wander asked and the Jacko nodded eagerly.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #24: Monster Monday #4 Lord Hater  
> Warnings: None

“Sir, why aren’t you ready yet?” Peepers closed the bedroom door behind him. “The party has already started.” He placed his hands on his hips.

“I know; I’m going to be fashionably late. All the cool villains will be. Only lame-os show up on time,” Hater claimed. “Probably why you wanted to be there already,” he muttered.

Peepers ignored his last comment. “Sylvia called me. Wander and her are already there.” Peepers flipped his phone open and shut before pocketing it again. “She said it looks, well, awesome.”

“I rest my case,” Hater folded his arms across his chest smugly.

Peepers rolled his eye. “Alright, point taken. Well, let’s start getting you ready. What do you want to go dressed as?” Peepers asked. “We still have a few costumes from other parties in the past.”

“Peepers, I’m not dressing up. The theme this year is to be the greatest, scariest monster. What’s more terrifying than me?” Hater motioned to himself. “I’m a walking skeleton monster with electrical powers. I’m going to win this monster contest for sure. Not to mention, you know, that I’m the greatest. But that’s not a contest.”

Peepers lifted a finger, prepared to argue, then stopped himself. “Sure, sir, alright. Can we just get going already? Sylvia is still upset at me for being late for the last costume party.” 

“Is that why you’re wearing that?” Hater asked, looking at Peepers. 

“Don’t ask, sir.” Peeper sighed, tugging on the leotard.

“But I already did ask.” Hater stated.

“Let’s just go already.” Peepers crossed his arms and left the room, Hater following after him.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The party was hosted by Emperor Awesome every year. Normally Hater never went to this party. Usually because he was never invited. He still hadn’t been invited, but Wander and Sylvia were both invited and allowed to bring a date. This was the first time Hater was actually able to get into his party.

Anyone and everyone was there. There were decorations, different levels of dance floors, and all kinds of food imaginable. But people didn’t come to his party just to enjoy a night of dancing and drinking. They came to win. Emperor Awesome always had a theme for the party and his prizes were known to be amazing. 

“Hatey, I’m so glad you made it!” Wander wrapped his arms around Hater’s waist. “Isn’t this party amazing?”

“Wander, are you dressed like,” Hater critically examined Wander, “me?”

“Well of course, Hater! The theme is to dress like the greatest! No one is greater than you.” Wander swooned, lifting his leg as he clasped his hands under his chin. 

“Of all the stupid things. The party theme was, uh, Lord Hater, are you okay?” Peepers frowned, staring at Hater. His face was glowing and his eyes were wide as he stared at Wander intently. “Uh, sir? I’m starting to get concerned.”

“Peepers, I’ve already won tonight.” Hater declared. “Wander, we’re leaving. Forget this party, I’ve got something a lot better in mind.”


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #25: Candy Corn  
> Warnings: None

“I hate candy corn.” Hater glared at the bowl as though it had personally offended him. The only reason he didn’t zap it was because Wander was holding the bowl.

“Why? Did a girl you like once upon a time really like candy corn? So then when she rejected you that’s when you decided that candy corn was awful?” Sylvia asked, grabbing a handful of the treat to chew on obnoxiously as she challenged Hater.

Hater turned his glare on her and crossed his arms defensively. “I’m right, aren’t I?” She smirked.

Peepers and Wander looked concerned as they noticed tears beginning in Hater’s eyes. “Hatey?” “Sir?” They asked in unison.

“It wasn’t just some girl,” Hater sneered, turning his angry tears on Sylvia. “It was my mom.” He turned on his heel and marched out of the room.

“Hater, wait, I--” Wander flailed as Peepers grabbed him. 

“No, not now. He needs some time.” Peepers explained. “And you will need to apologize.” He narrowed his eyes at Sylvia.

“I didn’t know,” Sylvia frowned. “I mean; I could have suspected that he had mommy issues but--”

“Stop it.” Sylvia jumped a little, startled at hearing Wander take that kind of tone with her. “That’s not nice, Sylvia. You can tease Hater about some things but not about this.”

Sylvia nodded, feeling upset with herself that she had disappointed Wander. “I know; I’ll apologize to Hater once he’s had a bit of time to cool down. I didn’t know, Wander, okay?”

“No one knows,” Wander stated, looking at Peepers for confirmation. Peepers nodded solemnly. “He never talks about her. He never talks about anyone from his family.” Wander stared down into the bowl of colorful, kernel shaped candies. “There’s a lot that Hater won’t talk about.”

The three grew quiet after that. But of course Wander wouldn’t let a sad moment last. He tucked the candy corn away into his hat and pulled out some jawbreakers. “This would be a nice apology gift to take with you.” He suggested. “Ooh, maybe I should make up some of Hater’s favorite cookies too. Now I’m in the baking mood! Peepers, would you mind if I use the kitchen?” He asked, already starting to leave the room as he pulled out his apron and oven mitts. 

“Hater has some actual issues, huh?” Sylvia asked, moving the bag of jawbreakers from one hand to the other. “Issues that he won’t even share with you? Now that’s surprising, I thought he let you know about every little hiccup and burp that happens to him.”

“I know you’re trying to make light of the situation because that’s the kind of person you are,” Peepers acknowledged. “But you have to understand that a lot of things have happened to Lord Hater to make him become the person he is.” 

“How long should I wait until I go apologize?” Sylvia asked.

“Wait until Wander has finished baking the cookies.” Peepers suggested. “Then you can go.” Sylvia nodded.


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #26: Witches  
> Warnings: None

“Kitty!” Hater shouted excitedly. He knelt down and held out his hand as he began to make cooing noises. “Here kitty, kitty, kitty. Come on, come here. I won’t hurt you. I just wanna pet your soft fur, yes I do, kitty. Look how pretty you are!”

The black cat took a few steps towards Hater. “It’s coming this way!” Hater’s eyes widened and he glanced back at Wander with amazement. “It’s going to let me pet it!” He knelt down, holding out his hands eagerly. 

“Um, Hater, hon, I don’t think that’s just a regular cat.” Wander began, a wide smile on his face. He loved watching Hater’s love for animals in action.

“Ooh, I’m petting it! What a good kitty you are, yes you are. You’ve got the softest fur and, oh, you like being scrit-scratched under your little chinny-chin, don’t you? Yes, you do, kitty.” Hater was too delighted in petting the cat to heed Wander’s words.

Wander began to giggle as the cat purred and rubbed its head against Hater’s knee as Hater scratched the cat’s raised backend. Hater was still complimenting and praising the cat with baby talk as he pet and rubbed and scratched. Wander knew how good Hater’s pointed fingers felt scratching a back. 

“He knows all the good spots,” Wander commented.

“He really does,” the cat agreed, purring loudly. “Oh, a little more to the left, please.”

“Uh,” Hater’s hands grew still. “Um, I thought you were just a regular cat. The last sentient cat person I saw wore, you know, clothes and stuff.” Hater drew his hand back and pointedly looked at the cat’s bare body. The cat quirked an eyebrow and sat down, looking at Wander and then back at Hater with a wordless rebuke. “Hey, Wander wears a hat and shoes. That’s clothes like stuff.” 

“I suppose that’s fair. But I’m not a cat person. I’m a regular person just currently turned into a cat. My name is Salem.” She introduced.

“Nice to meet ‘cha, Salem! I’m Wander, and this is the Greatest in the Galaxy, Lord Hater. How did you get turned into a cat? Oh,” Wander gasped and placed his hands over his mouth. “Was it an evil curse and you’re on a quest to find your true love to break it?”

“No, nothing of the sort.” Salem shook her head. “I turned myself into a cat for fun. I can do it at will. See,” the cat’s eyes began to glow. Shortly after that, her whole body glowed until it began to grow. Then a small being stood before them. Just as bare as the cat had been but lacking the fur. “Oh, right, I was a cat today because I was avoiding my laundry too.” 

Hater slapped a hand over Wander’s eyes and his own. “Turn back into the cat!” He demanded. “It’s less creepy seeing a naked cat.”

“Sorry about that.” A moment later she was retransformed. “Better?”

“Yes, but I’m not petting you anymore.”


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #27: Trending 27th  
> Warnings: None
> 
> This month's topic for attempting to get SaveWOY trending on Tumblr is top three favorite episodes from season one! So that is the prompt I went with. If you haven't signed the petition yet to try and get this awesome show a third season, please do!  
> https://www.change.org/p/walt-disney-encourage-disney-to-make-wander-over-yonder-season-3

“Hi, Hater!” Wander jumped onto the bed, his tiny body not affecting Hater’s at all. 

“Hey,” Hater paused his game as Wander moved quickly from the bed to Hater’s lap. Hater raised his controller to give Wander the space. “Did you just get back?”

“Yep! It was amazing! You’ve gotta come with Sylvia and me next time.” Hater made a noncommittal hum and began to play his game again. “Hey, Hatey, you remember that time Flendar when I used my banjo to—“

“Ugh, don’t remind me!” Hater grumbled and stuck his tongue out as he twisted his controller to the side. It always worked better to control the characters if you actually moved the controllers too.

“Okay, sorry.” Wander watched the screen for a quiet moment. “Hey, remember that time we fell into your prison dimension together? We found a bunch of my other friends already there. Then we became best of friends for a little bit until Peepers and Sylvia rescued us. Remember that time?”

Hater sighed as his character fell into a lava pit. “Yes, Wander, I remember that time. Why are you bringing it up?”

“Well, it was just a few weeks after your date with Sylvia.” Wander chuckled. “You surely remember that, right?”

Hater squinted his eyes. “I never dated, oh, right! That time you and Sylvia both wore dresses to trick me. Well, that one time Sylvia wore a dress. You wear dresses like every other week.”

“Right! Well, when we were in the prison, I think that was when I first realized I liked you.” Wander mused with a wide grin.

Hater frowned down at him. “No way, you liked me from day one. You were all sunshine, banjo, and hugs from the first moment together.”

“Pfft, no, not like you like a friend like you. You’re right; I liked you as a buddy from day one! I meant like like you.” He waggled his eyebrows up at Hater. 

“Weirdo.” Hater’s face was glowing green. He glanced around the room despite knowing that they were alone, not counting Captain Tim, before he ducked his head to give Wander a quick peck on the lips. “You would get a crush on me only after I dated your best friend and then got stuck with you in a terrible otherworld dimension.” 

“Hehe, yep,” Wander nodded. “When would you say you started to like me?” 

Hater paused his video game before it could do more than reload after his last checkpoint. He was silent for a moment before his face began to glow even more. “Probably when you sang with me.” 

“Really?” Wander’s eyes widened with joy. “Wait, which time?”

“Well, all of them,” Hater admitted. “When you sang with me to try and win over Dominator, both times, and then after that when we,” Hater smiled down at Wander. “You remember, that time, right?”

Wander giggled and reached up to wrap his arms around Hater, bringing their faces together. “Hater, I remember all our adventures together.”


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #28: Phobia Friday #4 Lord Hater  
> Warnings: None

“It’s just an honor, Lord Hater, sir, to finally be able to have this chance to interview you. And you’re still okay with this show being by a Watchdog just for Watchdogs, right? Or are you going to yell and flip my table again?” Andy asked, bracing his hands in front of his face.

“No, I know this show is just for Watchdogs, and now also Wander. That’s why I’m here. Wander, not the Watchdogs. You hear that, Wander, I’m doing it so stop nagging me already, sheesh!” Hater pointed into the camera. “So, what now? You ask me some questions and I spill my metaphorical guts to you?”

“Not necessarily, sir,” Andy began. “I do have some questions lined up but we could--”

“Because I don’t have real guts, being a skeleton and all. I can’t share my real guts with you.” Hater pulled down the top half of his robe. “See? Just my full-figured bones and my beating heart. Does a heart count as guts?” He asked. Andy replied with an “Um,” before Hater continued. “Even if a heart is a gut, I can’t share that because my heart’s already taken by another. Or shared with another because he’s sharing his heart too. Or whatever kinda mushy thing he’d say.” Hater released his robe and it slapped back into place. “Ugh, domestic life is making me so sentimental about, like, metaphors and stuff.” He started to massage his lightning horns. 

Andy simply stared at Hater and then glanced into the camera for a moment. “Um.”

“Just ask me a stupid question or something already, Toner!” Hater shouted. “Or do I have to do this whole interview thing myself?”

“Well,” Andy began.

“Fine!” Hater snatched up Andy’s microphone. He cleared his throat. “Alright, Lord Hater, you are the most fearsome and greatest in the galaxy. But is there anything that fills you with fear? Can you be stopped by something? Well, me, that’s a great question. I know it might seem impossible, but there are some things that frighten me.”

“Really? Like what?” Andy asked.

“Oh, now you have a question for me?” Hater rolled his eyes. “Well, to start off, I’m afraid of the dark and that’s why every room in the Skullship has a mandatory night light.”

“That’s why those are there!” Andy glanced at the skull shaped light plugged into the outlet on the wall.

Hater nodded. “Yeah. I’m also afraid of--”

“Sir, stop!” Peepers barged into the room. “Andy’s stupid show picked up a different frequency. You’re not broadcasting live to the ship; you’re broadcasting live to the entire galaxy!” 

Hater stared at Peepers. “Well, I think I can add this to my list of fears.” He stared at the camera. “Now that I have your attention, galaxy, I can tell you that you’ve all just been pranked!” He jumped onto the table. “Yeah, Lord Hater, number one super star, is fearless and he--” Hater screamed as he slipped on his robe backward off the table.


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #29: Murder Mystery Dinner Party  
> Warnings: None

“This might be the coolest thing you have ever done, Wander.” Peepers admitted, looking around the transformed cafeteria. Everyone had been banned from the room until Wander had finished decorating. He had wanted the atmosphere to be perfect for this big event.

The food court looked like something out of a haunted mansion dining room. The booths had been completely changed and covered so that they were almost camouflaged perfectly with the wallpaper that Wander had put up. A long table was the main attraction to the room. There were centerpieces of decoration skulls that flickered through the eyeholes due to the candlelight inside. Elegant china was set out in front of each place sitting that was marked with a folded piece of paper stating which seat was reserved for which guest.

“Why thank you, Commander.” Wander beamed, pleased to receive his first compliment from Peepers ever. That was going to be a success he’d write down in his diary later. Already his hard work was worth it and they hadn’t even started the fun.

“What does Peepers know about cool?” Hater rolled his eyes. “Although, yeah, this place looks much better than how the old food court looked. I like the candles.” Hater narrowed his eyes. “How did you get them to float?”

“I asked them real nice,” Wander answered. Hater frowned but before he began to further question Wander’s decorating skills, he reminded himself that this orange weirdo had once giftwrapped his entire ship and everything on it, including most of the living beings.

“Alright, here’s everyone’s envelopes. Open them up, read them, don’t share any information yet, and don’t look at other’s papers. Yeah, that means you peeping Tom! Keep your eye on your own paper.” Sylvia instructed as she went about passing out each hand written envelop that Wander had carefully constructed. “Inside you will find your character’s name, their background story, the reason they are at this dinner party, and their motive for the murder.”

“Whoa, whoa, murder? What murder? I didn’t plan out any murders.” Wander protested, looking at Sylvia. “Why would I include a murder for our dinner party?”

Sylvia sighed. “Because it’s a murder mystery dinner party, Wander. If no one is murdered, then what’s the mystery?”

“Oh, I thought the mystery part was guessing everyone’s dreams and hopes for the future as their character. For example, my character is a simple peach farmer that dreams of one day growing apples as well.” Wander grinned widely as he showed off his character sheet.

Peepers sighed. “I take it back; this is just as stupid as everything else you’ve ever done.” He crumbled up his envelope and threw it at Wander’s head. “I’m ordering Chinese and going to bed.” 

“Does that mean no one wants to play anymore?” Wander asked, turning sad, wide eyes onto Sylvia and Hater.

Hater groaned and rubbed at his temples. “If anyone else leaves, I’ll zap you. We’re all going to play Wander’s happy mystery dinner party game.”


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #30: Halloween on the Skullship/Trick or Treating  
> Warnings: None
> 
> I combined tonight and tomorrow's prompt because I want tomorrow to be one last Monster Monday with a special character I have yet to include in these little tales.

“We celebrate Halloween a little differently here on the Skullship.” Peepers began to explain. “We can’t simply go trick or treating because then that means half of the soldiers have to stay behind so that they can pass out candy while only half of the others can go around and collect the candy. We tried that and there were riots. Never try to get between Watchdogs and free candy.” Peepers warned. “So now we do things in a way that everyone can pass out candy and collect candy at the same time.”

“How’s that?” Wander asked.

“Each Watchdog is given one candy dish that glows in the dark. They are to fill it with whatever treat or trick they want. They can leave the bowl in their barracks, or in the halls, or anywhere else on the Skullship, except in Lord Hater’s room or the smooching rooms. The smooching rooms used to be allowed until the Watchdogs got too distracted,” Peepers sighed. “Then, at the designated time, I shut off the power to the Skullship. We have to search in the dark for the bowls. When you find a bowl, you can reach inside for a trick or a treat. Then you go in search of more bowls.”

“That sounds amazing!” Wander jumped up and down excitedly. “This is going to be so much fun.”

“Wait, what kinds of tricks are there?” Sylvia asked.

“I once got a mousetrap snapped on my hand, a spider bite, and a spaghetti sauce stain on my gloves.” Peepers stared at his hand with sad memories.

“I don’t know what Peepers is talking about,” Hater argued. “I’ve gotten all sorts of cool stuff. Like a bunch of candy, a new pet spider, a mousetrap toy for Captain Tim, and spaghetti! The Watchdogs are really creative with the treats they put in their bowls. I mean, there’s the typical sweets and stickers and sometimes individual bags of chips. One even gave out soda which was nice. But what is really important is the fact that I am the only one to ever find all of the bowls hidden on the Skullship.” Hater bragged, clearly proud of himself. 

“That’s because you cheat, Lord Hater. Everyone else has to stumble around in the dark to make it somewhat challenging and you use your electric powers to light the way for yourself.” Peepers crossed his arms over his chest.

“Do you expect me to go wandering around in the dark?” Hater grimaced at his own wording and glanced at Wander, who’s grin seemed to be a little wider at having his name be used. “Besides, I’m the boss, it’s only fair that I win.”

“But it’s not a contest!” Peepers pointed out.

“Then why are you so upset about losing?” Hater asked.

Peepers pulled his helmet down and screamed his frustration into it. “Alright, sir, this year, why don’t you take Wander with you when you go trick or treating? Maybe then you’ll understand the point of it being in the dark and have more fun with it.”

“But,” Hater hesitated, “I don’t wanna be in the dark.” He admitted in a small voice.

“We’ll be okay, Hatey,” Wander assured, leaning into Hater’s side. “You can hold my hand the whole time! Besides, it’s just on the Skullship. We can’t possibly get lost or hurt here on your own ship, not with how well we know it.” 

“He still uses the pocket map of the ship. This is the only time during the year that Lord Hater actually walks around the ship instead of just transporting himself everywhere.” Peepers informed.

“Not with how well I know your ship,” Wander corrected.

Hater still seemed unsure, but he nodded. “Okay, but I swear if you let go of my hand then I am lightning up the whole ship.”

“No worries, Hater, I will not let go of you!” Wander reached for Hater’s hand and gripped it securely in his own.

“Great, now we still have a few hours to get into our costumes and hide our own goodie filled bowls.” Hater grinned, feeling better now that they were off of that subject. “I’m using jawbreakers to fill my bowl, so none of you better use those too! I also know the perfect hiding spot.” Hater ran for his room, halfway down the hallway, he realized Wander was running beside him. He was still holding his hand. “Um, you can let go of my hand now.”

“No can do, Hater, I made you a promise and I aim to keep my promises.” Wander grinned.

“Oh boy this is going to be a long night.” Hater sighed and slowed down his pace. 

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Everyone was gathered in the food court with their empty sacks. This was the place everyone needed to be in order for the night to start. All the Watchdogs were in costumes, despite the lights about to be turned off and no one able to see the costumes again until the Halloween party afterwards. 

“He’s been holding my hand the whole time. I had to pop my arm off in order to get dressed and use the bathroom.” Hater complained to Peepers. 

“You’re dating him, sir, what do you expect?” Peepers had no mercy towards Hater’s complaints about Wander. 

“Are you two going trick or treating together?” Wander asked, looking from Peepers to Sylvia.

Sylvia nodded. “Yeah, he’ll be in my saddle and direct me where to go. But I told him for every wall I run into it’ll cost him one span--uh well, it’ll cost him later when we’re alone.” Sylvia smirked as Peepers tugged at the neckline of his costume. 

“Alright, I think it’s almost time to begin!” Peepers declared.

Hater squeezed Wander’s hand in his own. “You promise nothing bad will happen in the dark.”

“Nothing bad will happen. In fact, I’m planning on giving you an extra sweet treat at every bowl.” Wander puckered his lips and winked, making Hater smile. 

Best Halloween ever.


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt #31: Monster Monday #5 Lord Dominator  
> Warnings: None

“In a forest dark and deep, do not wander, do not sleep,” Dominator tossed the book over her shoulder. “Blah, blah, blah. It’s the same scary stories every year and they always fall flat.” She clicked on the television and flipped through the channels. “Same spooky movies every year with the same predictable deaths by the lackluster monsters.” She threw the remote into the television screen. “Every year it’s the same thing on Halloween. Halloween has barely started and I am already so bored!” She pouted and glanced out the window. “I wonder what those losers are doing for Halloween. Computer!” She screamed into the ceiling. “Find that loser Hater and his ship. Maybe terrorizing them will be a fun change for my Halloween night.”

“Yes, Dominator.” A robotic voice rang out from around her. She felt the ship increase speed from its aimless wandering. “Destination found, Dominator.” The ship announced a moment later.

“Took you long enough!” She complained. Glancing out the window, she noticed the lack of lights on the Skullship. “Huh, I wonder if that idiot fried his own circuit board. Ooh, that means their defenses are down! Well, I mean, they’re always defenseless when it comes to me, but this will be even more fun to attack them when they’re already in the midst of a crisis. Alright, bots, stay alert and on call. I’m going solo on this.” She laughed as she suited up and blasted her way over to Hater’s ship.

The hole she made in the side of the Skullship allowed light to seep into one hallway. “Oh, I was just about to run into that pole. Thanks, Dominator!” Pete called out as he grabbed a piece of candy and then ran down the hallway in search for the next bowl.

Dominator kept her mask down since it had a night vision setting that allowed her to see everything. She looked into the glowing bowl. “Ooh, gummy worms.” She grabbed a handful and lifted her visor to plop them into her mouth. She grabbed the next Watchdog running by. “If you want me to spare your miserable life, explain what is happening.”

“Halloween tradition on the Skullship.” Larry answered with a squeal. “Try to find all the glow in the dark bowls filled with treats or tricks and fill your bag. There’s only an hour and a half left but all rooms on the Skullship are fair game, except for Hater’s bedroom and the Smooching rooms.”

“Ugh, lame. Well, I guess this is better than anything else I had planned tonight.” She snatched the sack out of Larry’s hands and dropped him on the ground. She dumped the contents of the sack over his head. “I’m using your bag. Take your stupid things because I’m going to collect better ones.”

“Okay, I’ll just go find David and share his sack. He’s more interested in other things tonight than the event anyways, like the going ons in the smooching room,” Larry muttered as he ran off.

Dominator sighed as she flipped her mask back down. “I miss the good old days where I used to be able to terrify those twerps.” She stormed off, the sack dragging behind her. Maybe stealing candy from those losers would make her feel better.

Surprisingly enough, she didn’t run into any other Watchdogs. She did find about twenty bowls in only a few minutes and she dumped each bowl into her sack. Except for the bowl filled with licorice and the other bowl filled with worms that were not of the gummy variety. 

Sylvia and Peepers walked past her in the dark hallway, unaware of her presence as Peepers gave Sylvia step-by-step instructions for each of her steps. Dominator stuck her foot out to trip the Zbornak which caused Peepers to go flying off her back. It took everything in her to not laugh and give herself away as the two started to argue at one another. 

As she was dumping another bowl’s contents into her sack, she heard two familiar voices coming up the hallway. “Ah, finally I found those dorks. Alright, let’s give them a nice trick too.” She whispered to herself and watched them approach.

They were holding hands as they walked down the hallway. Although she couldn’t understand how they had gotten together, not that she really cared. She was just glad the skeleton was finally over her. He was just way too desperate and seemed too needy for her. 

“It’s just right up ahead, Hatey. Seventeen more steps and we’ll be there.” Wander assured.

“Alright, just, you know, keep leading the way.” Hater allowed Wander to walk slightly in front of him and used their connected hands. “I can see the glowing. It’s on another shelf from the height of it so I’ll have to grab it this time.”

“Just be careful, the last one did have scorpions.” Wander reminded as they stopped in front of the bowl.

“I know, weren’t they just the cuddliest little things?” Hater smiled as he reached into the bowl. Dominator watched as his expression fell flat. “It’s empty! But how is it empty?” Hater shouted with outrage.

“Everyone else must have beaten us to this bowl,” Wander shrugged even though Dominator was the only one to see it. “Oh well, I guess that means I’ll just have to give you an even bigger treat myself to make up for the lack of one for your bag.”

“Oh, well, that doesn’t sound so bad.” Hater tugged Wander against his body and knelt down. Wander blindly reached out until he found Hater’s face and was able to bring their mouths together. Unlike the short kisses they had shared at the other treat bowls, this one was much longer and involved a lot more tongue.

Dominator watched quietly for a moment until Hater’s free hand began to wander. “Whoa, whoa, okay this was not the scary stuff I wanted to see tonight!” She complained, making the two jump and break apart from their kiss.

“Dominator, is that you?” Wander asked, smiling into the darkness.

“Dominator? What are you doing on my ship? What are you even doing back in this galaxy?” Hater demanded, using his free hand to summon electricity and illuminate Dominator.   
“I’ve been back in this galaxy for weeks now. I was starting to plan this big revenge plot against you two for ruining my last ship, but then there was a really good marathon on tv so I kinda got distracted for a week.” Dominator waved her hand dismissively in the air. “Anyways, I was bored and decided tonight was a good of night as any to start my revenge, especially with your ship’s defense mechanisms down.”

“Oh yeah, we do turn those off too, I never thought about that as a weakness.” Hater tapped his chin thoughtfully.

“Yeah,” Dominator shifted her sack from her side over her shoulder. “Anyways, for my first act of revenge, I’ve been stealing all the good stuff from these candy bowls. And now, I’m going to steal your candy sacks.” She snatched the bags from where the two had dropped them in favor of grabbing each other. “And I’m out, see ya later losers!” She blasted the wall only to see more darkness. “Um, which wall do I have to blast in order to get back into outer space?”

“Oh, if you blast two more in that direction you should make it out.” Wander helpfully supplied.

“Cool, bye!” She jumped through the wall and covered her tracks with an ice wall. She blasted her way out of two more walls and back into the night sky, satisfied with her evil dead for the night as she cackled and made her way to her own ship.

“She’s a monster! I hope she gets a stomach ache,” Hater complained as he sniffled and rubbed at his wet eyes with his no longer glowing hand. Wander was still holding his other. “I can’t believe she stole our candy!” He wanted to cry harder than he already was.

“Aw, Hatey, don’t get upset, we still have plenty of time to gather more. We can just drop the pieces into my hat and dump them out later.” Wander reassured.

“Yeah, but I had some really good pieces already.” Hater sniffled. 

Wander felt around until he could press a kiss to both of Hater’s cheeks. “I’m sure my hat has whatever candy you need in order to feel better.”

“But it’s not the same!” Hater wailed.

“Would a few more kisses make it better?” Wander asked as he crawled up to sit on Hater’s shoulder. He figured they were mostly finished with the night’s activities of trick or treating since Hater seemed too upset to try and start again.

“Well,” Hater considered it. “They wouldn’t make it worse. Besides, I can always just make Peepers go out and buy me whatever candy I want tomorrow.” 

“That’s the Halloween spirit!” Wander chuckled as he leaned against Hater’s head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's it! This was a fun way to write for my favorite group of characters. Now I need to get back into my other fics and finish my series. Thanks for reading and all the awesome comments along the way!~


End file.
